Blue Nylons 2

A couple of years ago I suddenly realized, as I sat in Sacrament meeting, that I was wearing blue nylons with a black skirt and black shoes. I was pretty embarrassed but made it through church without anyone noticing.

And then suddenly today when I was setting up my Sunday School class I realized that I was once again wearing blue nylons with a black skirt and black shoes. The lighting in the classroom somehow made the blue really obvious. Why did I originally buy these blue nylons? I can’t remember, but somehow they keep showing up.  And I was so happy this morning when I found a pair of nylons in the back of my sock drawer because I was running late and didn’t know if I had any to wear today and I didn’t really want to show off my January white legs.

I don’t think I bought two pairs of blue nylons so these must be the same pair from a couple of years ago. They have been hiding in the back of my sock drawer all this time.

Needless to say, the blue nylons went straight into the trash as soon as I got home. There will be no Blue Nylons 3.

 

Borders Zone 14

Customer: Hi. I'd like to return this book.
Me: Okay, do you have your receipt?
Customer: No, it was a gift. They didn't give me the receipt/I don't want them to know I'm returning it.
Me: I'm sorry, we don't accept any returns or exchanges without a receipt.
Customer: Can't I just get store credit?
Me: No, I'm sorry. We don't accept any exchanges without a receipt.
Customer: Not even for store credit?
Me: No. I'm sorry, that is the return policy.
Customer: Well you used to take returns without a receipt. I've returned stuff here before.
Me: Yes, in the past we did. But our return policy changed about 2 years ago and we no longer take anything back without a receipt.
Customer (angry): Well what am I supposed to do with this book? I already have it/don't want it/feel like I am entitled to your store's money because I got a gift I don't want.
Me: I don't know. You could give it to someone else or donate it to a library or ask whoever gave you the gift for a receipt.
Customer: Well I never. I am never coming back here again. I can't believe this. I have never had such horrible customer service. (Customer storms out of the store.)

If I have to have this conversation one more time I am going to scream!

Borders Zone 13

Regulars Part Deux

We have a new regular. He showed up two weeks ago and has been showing up every day since. His name is Elastic Pants Man. Can you guess who came up with his name?
So anyways, EPM got his name because he always wears brown pants with an elastic waistband. You can see the elastic because he also always wears a white undershirt tucked into said elastic band. He shows up in the morning and often stays until the store closes.

What does he do all day you ask?
1. Reads our books, mostly comics and local history without paying.
2. Talks loudly for hours at a time on his cell phone, often spouting strange political ideas..
3. Plays games on his laptop using the free wifi and the not free electricity.
4. Naps.
5. Gets free cups of ice water from the cafe.
6. Lets employees know about his various successful business ventures.
7. Smells bad.

Borders Zone 12

We have a very chatty guy who comes and changes the burned out lightbulbs in our store about once a month. His chattiness usually bugs me, but he said the most brilliant thing on Saturday.
"Sitting in here and reading all day is just like taking your own plate and fork to a buffet."
Amen lightbulb guy, Amen.