Q: What is a definite sign you should call in sick?
A: When a bird poops on your face when you are walking across the parking lot to work.
True story. When I was walking into work yesterday I felt something wet hit my face. I looked up to see if it was raining and simultaneously wiped my face with the back of my hand. To my dismay I saw a smear of bird poo on my hand instead of rain clouds in the sky. I hurried into the store to wash off my hand and cheek. Even though my soul was filled with horror I went ahead and clocked in. My night went downhill from there. Here are some highlights.
-I started to get a cold and my voice grew gradually deeper all night.
-When I got back from by break a customer yelled at me because the bathrooms were disgusting. I was surprised because I had just used the bathroom at the beginning of my break and it had been fine then. When I went to see what the problem was I discovered that someone had knocked over the trashcan and thrown their poopy toilet paper on the ground instead of in the toilet. Who got to clean it all up? If you're guessing someone other than me you are totally wrong.
-We were super busy because we had a big sale, but the managers neglected to schedule anyone extra from 8:00 pm on so the customers were a little angry with (you guessed it again) me.
I also got some bad news about our holiday prep but that mainly just upset my mood and didn't involve anyone yelling at me. The moral of the story - if a bird (or anything else for that matter) poops on you on your way to work, turn around and go home. Even if the closest sink is at work.
4 comments:
What luck! At least all the bad things happened in one night so hopefully next time everything will go right!
You crack me up.! Oh yuck! A bird pooped on me once when I was a kid. So nasty! But the poopy toilet paper is the worst! Who does such a thing? Poor you! When you were in Argentina did people throw their toilet paper away instead of flushing it?
I hope you are feeling better!
Yeah. They had to put signs in the church bathrooms telling people to flush their toilet paper, but there were still piles of poopy paper all the time. Yuck.
I think I threw up a little in my mouth when I read that. Ewwww
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